I wrote a post over on my life blog (which has been neglected recently but I’ll catch it up soon) and have spoken at length on my daily vlogs about my work situation and the potential that I would become a full time blogger.. well that day is fast approaching and I thought I’d update those of you who follow only my beauty related channels with that’s going on.
In a nutshell I’ve been a temp for the last 2+ years, it was a fairly secure job, they even had me back after I took time off to have Milo but as with most temporary positions it has now come to an end. It’s sad because though I didn’t love the job itself I will miss the people I work with and the daily routine. When I went back after having Milo I kept Monday off to maintain my blog and YouTube channels, I didn’t want to be always working so I thought that extra day would allow me to still have a weekend.. that didn’t really work out. I did what I could but I always ended up filming or blogging while Lee was around as a guaranteed babysitter as I didn’t want to risk Milo refusing his afternoon nap and me losing my time to work. I initially had hoped that my blog would allow me not to go back to work at all after my maternity allowance ended but unfortunately I wasn’t in that position and actually when I did go back I really enjoyed it. It’s hard to be at home with a baby all day, you lose motivation to get dressed and you lack a big chunk of social interaction. I’m sure it’s the same for those who work from home without kids around but when you have a baby who’s got up on the wrong side of bed that day you would give just about anything to sit in an office for a few hours. Much as I didn’t want to go back I’m not nervous to stay home.
I am luckily now in a position where my blog does pay my bills and so when my work comes to an end on the 23rd of this month I don’t have to rush out with a pile of CV’s under my arm.. I can look for something else.. or not, after all this is still work. There are two of us left in the office and we’re both part time so we’ve applied for a job share at the company we’re with and if that comes to pass I will be down to 2 days per week on a permanent employment contract which will suit me down to the ground. Enough time to get everything done at home and (hopefully) keep my evenings and weekends free as well as some structure to my week, a little extra money and Milo will be back with his childminder a couple of days which is good for him on a social level too. Unfortunately I can’t count on that so for now I have on my full time blogger hat and scared as I am to go it alone and rely on that income to fund me I’m excited to see what I can make of it given more time.
One thing I was really nervous about when this first became a serious possibility was perception – A rather well known blogger recently revealed that she had packed in her job to concentrate on her internet empire and she got a heck of a lot of stick for it. One reader dubbed her lazy and stupid which got me really riled up, it’s certainly not a lazy career path, it’s all on you whether you get paid at the end of the month.. you can’t just sit around doing nothing and miraculously still make money!! If you’ve got to the level that you can live off something you’ve created (whatever it may be) the last think you can be accused of it laziness, you have to work hard and be completely dedicated, you probably wouldn’t be reading this now if in the first few months I was on YouTube I hadn’t made 100 videos. There’s a common misconception that you can put out a few posts and make a bundle online but those who are doing that can do so because they put in the time before.. I’m certainly not there yet, I’m still building my audience and if I didn’t post for a day .. what am I saying? That will NEVER happen.. because I AM dedicated, I DO work hard and anyone who thinks it’s stupid to work for yourself is very short sighted.
I didn’t intend for that to get all defensive and ranty but once I had that comment in my mind I was on one – and it wasn’t even about me! Outside of those aware of the blogging community I worry about how people will see me in the ‘real world’ when I tell them what I do for a living. Will friends and family now consider me unemployed? Perhaps they wont understand that I’ve effectively worked 2 jobs for 3 years.. I guess they can make their peace with me being a ‘Stay At Home Mum’ but much as it pains me it does matter to me how I’m perceived by others – will suddenly the working girls (no hooker pun intended) find me hard to relate to because I don’t go out to work? These are the things that go through my mind when these major life decisions are to be made.. what will my readers think? After all I wouldn’t have the option to work from home if you guys weren’t reading this right now so although it seems crazy to take in to consideration the opinions of strangers it is those strangers that have given me this opportunity and what you think really does matter.
My plan is to try it out for a few months and see how I go, if I get this other job then great but if not and I don’t feel like the full time blogging is for me there are always jobs to be done.. I’m not above working in a bar or waitressing – some of the best jobs I’ve ever had! For now I thought I’d let you know the situation and give you this little insight in to my mind – scary I know.