A(nother) Fresh Start

New Year 2018 Balloons GlitterI've been blogging for a long time, so when I use generic titles like the above I assume there will already be another post by a similar name. If one pops up as a suggested second read, go take a look. If nothing else it should be amusing to see my lack of progress from then to now.FAMILYThis year I'm not making resolutions as such, but I have had a pretty tough year in a lot of aspects of my life and there are things I want to change. We moved in to our multi-generational home last Christmas and it was not easy. It's been a very steep learning curve and at times it's felt as though nobody is happy but toward the end of the year things really seemed to mellow. I haven't shared much about the trials of the new living situation because they aren't just my stories to tell but I will at some point give an update on what life is like living with my parents (and my own family) in my 30s.MARRIAGEThe issues with the move also had a knock on effect for me and Lee and if I'm entirely candid (which would always be my choice but again, not just my life) our marriage has been seriously tested. It's not been fun but we've learned a lot about each other (and ourselves) in the process. It's forced us to communicate more effectively and whereas this time last year I was really pretty down, I'm actually feeling really positive about the year ahead.KIDSThe kids have worked through their frustrating Summer phase (see ALL references to our family holiday) and have been lovely over Christmas. We're already planning our next big trip and are trying to forget how tired and grouchy we all were on the last one. Ella is 12 now (though I keep thinking she's 13) and is giving me all the sarcasm, which only makes us love her more. Milo is 6 and a ball of opinions, also hilarious and a born showman. Rather horrifyingly, he's already a tech addict, my favourite recent quote was 'the internet's not working, so we can talk'.WORKMy regular job was on the line until around Spring time, I ended up moving to a different role, learning something new and changing my working days. It's been different but I'm still only part time, I still enjoy the company of my colleagues and I haven't set anything on fire so I think it's going ok.METalking of setting things on fire, I actually changed my own car battery for the first time last month! I was so impressed with myself, just set the one small fire in my engine when momentarily touching both the positive and negative elements with my spanner but worse things have happened at sea. I've been trying to rely less on other people to help me with jobs I previously wouldn't have attempted so I suppose if I were to resolve one thing, it might be that.BLOGBlog/YouTube wise, I have to work harder. I had a crisis of confidence this year. They say that comparison is the thief of joy and they're absolutely right. I was already in a not so great place and I just started to feel like YouTube had outgrown me. A couple of years ago a couple people told me I worked too hard and wasn't making time for an actual life, I took it to heart and really scaled back but I now realise that wasn't the right thing for me. The people who made those comments didn't want YouTube to be their job, this is my job and I've been phoning it in.MOTIVATION2017 seems to have been the year of 'self care' and 'unplugging' but you can't just stop working for a month in the real world. In the past I would work myself too hard, I know that but I had a schedule and I kept it. This year I'm focusing on quality and consistency so there may be fewer videos and fewer posts but I want them to be posts that are worth spending your time on. There are more bloggers and vloggers than ever and it feels like we all have less time (doesn't it?) so I feel like that's the right move.And that's me. I'd like to talk a little more openly about life and relationships (because that's been hugely helpful for me from others) so you may see some self-indulgent-soul-searchy rubbish from me in the coming months but I'll also hopefully share some fun stuff too. You know, lipsticks and the like ;)Happy New Year

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